Saturday, February 06, 2010

Overheard at the Ateneo

Favorite entries from my new favorite website (Click on blog title to view):

Theo Prof: So class, what was Jesus' religion?
Students: Sir, Jew?
Theo Prof: Brilliant! He was a Jew. It's a good thing he didn't live in the mountains.
Students: ....
Theo Prof: Because then he'd be a Mountain Jew
Father Dacanay: (to his students na mag-on daw) do you kiss?
Couple: of course father
Fr Dacs: like in the movies, do you close your eyes when you kiss?
Couple: Yes father
Fr Dacs: why?
Girl: to shut off the whole world po, so that all i can feel is his kiss...
Guy: kasi father, pag nakadilat ako, maduduling ako kasi sobrang lapit nya...
Frat war fail...

Fratman U bumps Fratman A near flagpole in Rockwell
A: Anung problema mo?
U: Eh ikaw anong problema mo? Papalag ka!?
A: Ano gusto mong suntukan?
U: Sige tara! Ano? Ha!? Papalag ka?
A: Tara sa parking lot ng Powerplant!
U: Sige wait lang magcclass lang ako!
A: Sige ako rin magcclass lang.

classmate 1: chong anong pre-finals grade mo?
me: c lang bakit
classmate 1: *ngumiti at pumunta kay classmate 2* anong pre-finals grade mo?
classmate 2: b bakit?
classmate 1: tabi tayo.
Two seniors talking about immersion: 

student 1: San ba immersion mo?
student 2: Sa ano daw....IP.. Indigenous Poor
student 1: ah...? parang mali... Indigenous People kasi!
Math prof: What is = "2 apples plus 3 apples"?
Class: Ano po?
Math prof: A problem from la salle
I heard this story once about how Fr. David supposedly went to the province, together with some Jesuits, for a retreat or something. On the last leg of the trip, they apparently had to take a bus to the destination; LSD came in last and sat away from the other Jesuits. During that time a man sat down next to him; he did not know the man was carrying a knife. The man had been poking LSD's side with the knife; annoyed, and oblivious to the the man's true intent, he supposedly looked straight at the man and shouted 'WILL YOU STOP THAT?' It was only later that he figured out it was a robbery attempt. Hahaha saved by conyo.
Padre Ferriols Urban Legend:
Philo Class in Filipino...
A female student recited and kept on talking in english
Padre: hija, bakit ka ingles nang ingles?
Female student: kasi hindi ko po feel pag sa tagalog
Padre: P******** m*!!!
Female student: huhuhu (cried)
Padre: ano? feel mo na?
Fr Ferriols Ph 101 class in 2001. Padre was by that time frail and moved very slowly and carefully. He was listening to one nervous student ramble helplessly during a regular oral recitation, when he suddenly banged his fist on the table (making us all jump in our seats) and roared, "Bakit ka ba nagtatago sa GUBAT NG SALITA!!"
Another Padre Ferriols urban legend:
Padre: Prove to me that this chair does not exist.
Student: What chair?
Student got an A+, and Padre Ferriols insisted that the registrar put the A+ mark on the student's card.
May isang mag-i-immersion na hindi magaling magtagalog, kaya nanuod siya ng mga soap opera para masanay. Pagdating sa immersion, sabay tanong sa foster parents: "Gaano katagal na ho ba kayong HAMPASLUPA?"


Sa Ateneo, jologs ang pumansin sa estudyanteng artista na hindi mo close”



Sa Ateneo lang ipoprotesta ang pagbawal ng tsinelas (flip flops) pero hindi pagtaas ng tuition.”


3 tipsy students:
J1: Fuck you.
J2: With what?

haha. there are more than a thousand entries already. Congrats to the group admins!