And the best? (2009 in retrospect, part 2)

2009 was a relatively good year in so many ways.  I’m really thankful for all the blessings that I received this year.  While in my earlier blog post I cited my mom’s January 2009 scare as the worst episode of the year, we also feel very blessed that she made it and that we can still look forward to more years with her.

I’m grateful that none of the people I know were adversely affected by the calamities. Some of them may have lost or damaged homes but material things can be recovered. Nothing is as tragic as losing a loved one.

At work, I’ve been rewarded in a way that I didn’t expect: a promotion earlier in the year and a trip to the US in addition to official business trips.  Perhaps I can say that I’m in a better place compared to some… or it could be that I appreciate where I am more now that I’m probably over the quarter-life crisis period (because I’m over 25!!!) and have stopped looking for the specific purpose of my existence (haha).  I’m fortunate to be working with a really cool bunch of people that I’ve come to love.

As with the years before this, I continue to be thankful for being blessed with wonderful friends who share all my joys, pains, and everything in between. I love hanging out with people who give me sound or unsound advice, who listen to my issues and make me look at different perspectives, laugh at my jokes, tolerate my bullying, call out my mispronounciations... over breakfast, lunch, dinner, coffee, beer or nothing at all.  You are my family, classmates, colleagues... like I said, friends.

In comparison to the previous years, 2009 wasn’t bad at all.

2007 was rewarding in terms of achievement in a sense that we got a lot of recognition for the work that we’ve done. It’s also memorable because that’s the year when our grandmother passed on and Kimi Raikkonen won the driver’s championship (hurrah). 2008 is especially memorable for the summer: I got to see Maroon 5 and Incubus Live, went on a trip either with friends, family or officemates from March – June with just a week or two in between (Subic, Batangas, Baguio, Singapore, Nueva Ecija, Macau, Hong Kong, etc.).

THAT harrowing experience aside, I’ll probably  remember 2009 for the trips I made and the experiences that accompanied those. I’ve been alone in some of the trips but never lonely.  I’ll also remember 2009 as the year when Kimi Raikkonen retired from F1, Ateneo became back-to-back champions, and for the breakout of social networking sites.  Like the how the saying goes: Dance like the photo's not tagged, love like you've never been unfriended, tweet like nobody's followin'.

The Worst of 2009

I’ve been seeing a lot Facebook statuses with the sentiment that 2009 wasn’t one of the best years.  It’s pretty obvious why.  On top the personal challenges that people had to go through, there were the typhoons that destroyed communities, the passing on of some famous icons, and the economic downturn.

It depends on how you look at it.  I’d say 2009 wasn’t the best – but it also wasn’t bad.  It didn’t start quite right for our family – in January, we went through the most harrowing 24 hours of our lives when mom was rushed to the hospital and was declared dead on arrival.  Thankfully, she was revived after 3 long minutes but then she stayed in critical condition for the rest of the day.  We waited and prayed and consoled ourselves without guarantee that she’ll be okay.  With her condition, I’ve pretty much accepted the fact that it’s without cure and I thought I was prepared for anything.  That experience taught me that no amount of acceptance can ever prepare you for the moment when you’re about to lose a parent.  There was fear, anxiety, depression, frustration, stress, pain plus that I willed myself to stay strong for my father and sister who were both very panic-stricken.  I knew that if there was any amount of hope and positivism, it could only come from me and I wasn’t going to break down.  By then, Mom couldn’t talk. She only made gestures with her hands. 

I can still remember that moment when mom was in the emergency room with all sorts of tubes connected to her body and one tube bigger than a Zagu straw inserted in her mouth which went down through her throat to directly supply air to the lungs - it was a scene that reminded me of an episode in Grey’s Anatomy where any minute the doctor is expected to call a code (red/blue/black) and all the nurses would rush to the bed and use the defibrillator on the patient.  My dad was holding her feet, crying, and my sister was holding her left hand while tearfully staring at the machine which monitors the heart rate.  I wasn’t at her bedside. I was standing afar, looking at her chest and counting the times it would rise and fall, rise and fall, rise and fall, trying to distract myself from thinking about the worse that could happen.  My eyes wandered and met mom’s. She was staring at me, too, and her eyes were filled with tears.  So I went up to her right and then she slowly raised her hand and waved as if saying goodbye.  She then pointed to my sister, then dad, then me and then patted her chest where her heart is.  I can’t describe how I felt at that point but I managed to put on a brave face and hold my tears because my resolve was strong: it’s not yet goodbye.

That was the worst of 2009.  The best part of the whole experience was that my mother survived.  That incident brought our family even closer together.  It made me realize that it doesn’t really matter that my mom and I often disagree about random things or that sometimes she can make life difficult for me and I for her because that’s just how it is for most mothers and daughters.  If there’s anything that I could do, anything at all, so that my family would never have to suffer, I’ll do it.

EDIT: One more regrettable thing: I didn't get to see Nine Inch Nails... but I'm over it. Haha

It's old... but I still find it funny. hehe

Five seems to be the magic number, yes?

I just realized that I always belong in groups of five....

• There's five of us in my elementary/highschool barkada (same group)
• There's also five of us in my closest college circle of friends (comm)
• ...and five of us who lived together for 2-3 years in the Katipunan Condo
• At work, there's also five of us whom they call the golden girls (ex-officemates)
• ...and currently five of us whom they accuse of being in a clique because we're always together.
• In the family, there's also five of us then including Kuya, and five of us now including my nephew whom we'd like to think is Kuya's replacement in the family
• And among my cousins, there's 5 of us who are really close to each other because of age.

And then there are one-on-ones on the side - like my bestfriend doesn't belong to any of these five groups.

Wala lang. I can't sleep. Hehe

YUCK.

                  
                

That's all.

iPod blues

As the whole world probably knows, I almost lost all my iPod content last Friday. Oh, wait... I did lose it, but I also recovered ALL of it.  That's perhaps one of the shittiest things that could happen to a person who listens to music a lot.I mean, sure, you can get it back but the thought of losing that library you built over a period just really sucks.  Then I also wasn't sure I could recover all of it. I have to take note that it ruined my night which eventually was turned around not by anything but strong will and a little bit of alcohol (talking to self: you're in a party. It's a party! Think about iPod later. People are beginning to get worried, so don't be a diva.).  I didn't have anyone to blame -- it was all there when it was connected to the computer.  I even got to create a playlist using the computer.  I just noticed eventually that nothing was playing and when I asked, our prod manager said "ayaw na eh. Ewan ko bakit." Shempre ewan niya! So I checked and realized that everything was gone.  I guess, without human intervention, the computer with the outdated software did things on its own.

It took the entire recovery process something like 8 hours. 4 hours for actual recovery (not via iTunes) and then another 4 hours to transfer the recovered files to the iPod via iTunes.  While I was at it, I also got the chance to weed it out of stuff that I thought shouldn't be there. So now I have 7.89 GB worth of songs (2,131 tracks, 5 days) and 24.34 GB worth of videos. I'm still in the process of organizing everything, though (filenames and such). It's cumbersome but I'm not complaining. It's good enough that I got to recover everything.

I also appreciate that so many people wanted to help (and also appease me! haha):

• My coffee-loving colleagues who texted me from upstairs (when I was downstairs) asking me to come up already so we can 'raid the bar at pumarty nalang'.  That was very uncharacteristic of them and I knew they were only saying that to cheer me up because when I got there, they made sure I got a drink but they didn't really 'raid the bar' hehe; 

• My boss who came to the parking lot after the program ended because he said he knew I was there and offered to help recover most of the songs (there, props to you! thanks);

• My other boss who came to my office to say he was sorry about what happened and that he hopes I find a way to get the files back because they seem to be really important to me (aaaaaaw); 

• My sister who had a wonderful suggestion to buy all the MP3 collection CDs from Ruins so that I can have the most comprehensive pirated library ever (nyahaha) on top of all the original CDs that I would have had to rip again;

• My mom who reminded me that it wasn't the end of the world and at least 'di naman nawala pati iPod' (I know that, mother. I just took advantage of the chance to overreact!);

• Friends who teased me na i-donate ko nalang yung iPod na walang laman at ipamigay ang mga earphones (bwiset)

• My cousins who offered to bring their computers on Christmas Eve so that we can synch from their iTunes libraries (yehey, no need! you guys can sync again from mine!); 

• Another cousin who texted, "Saw your Facebook status. Ang hilig mong maging emotionally attached sa mga bagay na walang buhay. Steak dinner at my house tonight. Punta ko states bukas, you won't see me on Christmas." (thank you narin.)

• And finally, my other cousin who researched about this and found the solution! I remember when I was in your house and you saw my flickering screen the night I arrived - You took one look and then when I woke up, you showed me a document which detailed what was wrong with it.  The technicians at the mall said it had something to do with screen calibration but they can't figure out what and you said it's a hardware defect... we had it checked again, this time with the manufacturer and you were right! Bravo!

That's it for this weekend's episode.

Random Convos

Me: Bestfriend, samahan mo ko sa baba.
BF: Okay! I-uupdate narin kita about our recos for QC.

----------- Sa baba -------------

Me: O, what are the updates?
BF: Eto nga yon, kasi humihingi sila ng reco for next year.
Me: Yeah, I read the e-mail.
BF: So, uupdate na kita sa recos.
Me: What are the updates?
BF: Yun nga eh, wala akong maisip! Deadline na ngayon.

ahhlaveeeeeeeet!!!

Real SLOW day.

I've gone over my to do list and it looks like I've done everything so far. I've visited all the websites I regularly go to.  Done with my Facebook duties, I'm done tweeting what I can tweet... For the first time this year, tutunganga ata ako the whole day in the office.

And that's why I'm falling asleep already!

2009 According to Facebook

Keywords that resonated: Leadership, Caleb (Kings of Leon), Obama, Below Zero, Oasis, Eraserheads, Gweilos...

One thing's missing -- there was a lot of Ateneo in my status updates this year.  Because we are the champions, my friend!  I haven't been updating Facebook, though, because I found a new outlet in Twitter.  If we could do this in Twitter, perhaps the keywords will be composed of: Ferrari, Kimi, Raikkonen, F1, buzz (drinks), Windows, New York, Hong Kong, Singapore, Cebu, Batangas, Boracay, Baguio, Tagaytay Mafia Wars, Farm Town, Fro-yo...

First tweet on March 26 and I've got 1,413 tweets to date.

Not yet.

I should've done something like this in school.

Hahahahaha!!!

· · · — — — · · ·

Aside from the cool weather, shopping, party planning and parties, I still don't feel the Christmas spirit.  This year, it seems to me as if it's just another event that we need to get over and done with so we can go back to the daily routine.

Oh, right. I'm not a kid anymore. And I seriously, seriously need to do something about this waning zest for life. The bottle is almost empty.

· · · — — — · · · --> International Morse code distress signal.

I don't know what else to say...

except that I hate this day.
Good or bad, I just don't give a damn anymore.

Sing your song and light up the lights, we need to make this Christmas bright.

Well, that was the worst yet. The guys sped through their presentations, nobody asked questions... it was all done in less than 10 minutes. I've never seen anything like it.  Even the moderator was like... HUH?!

I now know what it's like for performers who don't get any reaction from the audience.

It all turned out well in the main event, though.  But we're only halfway done. The most important part is yet to be seen. Like usual.

Ghost writer

My dad's friend is dying but even then, he still found the time to e-mail my dad and their other friends, letting them know that they shouldn't worry about him because he has accepted his fate.  He said he had a few days, if not just hours, on earth.

Naturally, people had to reply.  For my dad's part, he had so much to say but with all the emotion, he found it hard to write everything.  The thing was he already had to reply as time was of the essence.  He was worried that if he put it off for another day, his friend might never get to read his letter.

Eto na, shet. He called me and asked for my help. He was already a bit teary-eyed when he was telling me the gist of what he wanted to say but couldn't articulate in writing.  I know it's my job -- one of the things I get paid for is to write what people want me to write... but a letter to a dying person? Darn! But I had to do it, of course.

I guess that's the difference -- if it were me, I wouldn't have been able to say exactly how I felt but I would've been able to write fluidly.  Perhaps the only time that I'd be able to talk about something that heavy is if I'm intoxicated... then somebody has to stop my talking!

Let's reawaken the fangirl in me.

Long day! Friday always seems to be the busiest day of the week for me such that getting a buzz after work becomes really necessary (haha or are we just justifying that?)... and what a dork I am! I get home and surf the net as if I didn't spend the day in front of the computer.  Oh, right. I wasn't surfing then.

Observation from a friend: I didn't seem to be as excited about New Moon as I was for Twilight. I haven't posted anything on New Moon yet.

Well, here it is. My New Moon post. I'm excited now that it's finally out after a year's worth of waiting. I know it's gonna be better than Twilight because from worse, it can only get better, right?

The improved version of the Wolfpack gets more exposure this time:

Don't they look like a bunch of sidekicks in a Pinoy movie? I can almost imagine one of them saying... "Saging lang ang may puso! Saging lang!" But mygosh, they're giving Ben Chan an idea for the next Bench ad. Pasikatin ang shorts na ganito! Teka, porke magkabarkada kayo, kailangan ba talaga pare-pareho ng shorts? :)

Jacob Black also underwent Extreme Makeover from Twilight:

To New Moon (naman!!!):

But Edward will always be Edward. I just hope di na namumuo yung make-up niya, otherwise, Max Factor = double fail!

After all the promotional stuff for New Moon, I bet Robert Pattinson's not gonna take a bath for weeks again.  Eeew, but if this is the straight-out-of-bed-pero-kailangan-naka-leather-jacket look, okay lang. :)

But who do I really want to be part of the Twilight Saga but isn't? STEVEN STRAIT! He would've been a better Edward. I watch The Covenant over and over and over again.

Good night and good morning. I'm finally getting to see New Moon in a few hours. I hope it doesn't disappoint.

It's official.

Raikkonen to take sabbatical in 2010.

Former world champion Kimi Raikkonen will take a sabbatical from Formula 1 next year, his manager has revealed, following the collapse of talks with McLaren about a deal for 2010.

Raikkonen said last month that, in the wake of being released from his Ferrari contract, his only option to remain in F1 was with McLaren - because he wanted to be guaranteed a top-line grand prix car.

However, amid increasing speculation that Jenson Button is on his way to the British team, Raikkonen's manager Steve Robertson revealed on Tuesday night that discussions with McLaren had come to an end.

"The options in F1 were with McLaren next season or not at all," Robertson was quoted as saying by respected Finnish newspaper Turun Sanomat, which has close links with the Raikkonen camp. "Kimi and McLaren were unable to reach an agreement, so he will not drive at the F1 level - at least not next year.

"A gap year means nothing for Kimi. He is more interested in fighting for wins and the world championship. F1 will miss Kimi. He worked hard over the summer - doing things in a Ferrari that only the best drivers are capable of."

AUTOSPORT understands that there were several stumbling blocks to a deal being completed with McLaren prior to the team finding out that Button was available and interested.

As well as a difference of opinion about wages, Raikkonen and McLaren were believed to not be in agreement about the number of sponsorship appearance days he should do, or about how free he was to do rallies.

With Raikkonen only interested in returning to F1 in a race-winning car, his best option for 2011 would appear to lie with Red Bull Racing - which has a theoretical vacancy for 2011 with Mark Webber currently only contracted until the end of next year.

Although it is not clear what Raikkonen will do next year, it is possible that he will focus his efforts on the World Rally Championship – while he sorts out an F1 return. Red Bull could be involved in his rally plans too.

The only thing that he will have to contend with is withdrawal from F1 but in terms of income, Ferrari will reportedly give him 17M if he sits out for a year, and 10M if he races for another team. Citroen Red Bull is a hefty sum for him to drive in WRC.  If everything goes well in WRC, I reckon (reckon! haha they use it a lot in BBC commentating) we won't see him again in F1.

Rally may not be a good TV sport but looks like it's becoming more popular now that it's attracting top motorsports personalities.  F1 drivers have driven there this year and there are also rumors of Valentino Rossi considering to do one.

Anyway, I'll continue watching F1 and see Button fly as number two. 2010 will be like a revelation year -- it will be proven how worthy a champion he is in equal machinery with the best. And I reckon (reckon!) we'll see him a lot on the podium (as he does well in a good car) but only after he follows Hamilton to the chequered flag.  And let us not forget the Ferraris who are making a comeback.  Forza Ferrari!

Looks like things have taken a wrong turn...

and Jenson Button is now reportedly going to McLaren. Raikkonen to WRC for Citroen Red Bull and is reportedly being offered a salary twice more than what Sebastian Loeb, reigning champion, is getting.

If this is true, someone please point me to a cable provider with a channel that shows all WRCs.

If it's not true then that's cool!

Pick-up line from Lola Techie

Good times, bad hangover.

But ahlaveeeet! :) We rarely post photos of ourselves because if we did, all the pics would look the same anyway. What differs everytime are the conversations -- those are priceless.

And there are certain days when I just wish I can instantly make all of them appear in front of me. We'll talk about serious stuff, laugh a lot, tell stupid jokes, insult each other, make fun of the world, sing our favorite songs, repeat our favorite lines, reminisce about the past and dream about the future. (yada yada yada... save the drama for your mama! haha)

I only got to see 1/4 of the troops last weekend because I got there at 2 a.m. already -- after work and drinks with my colleagues, which is another type of conversation altogether. It's like I switch worlds: I'm someone else when I'm at work and I only become myself again when I pass through the toll gates down south. 


Guys, I told you we have to devise something like the Truman Show so we can see each other's episodes at "The Office". I bet we'll all be laughing our asses off! There are times when I forget that I'm still technically in my 'work world' but I'm constantly reminded so I can get back into JGM mode. It's funny how being in the corporate world makes us mature (or rather obliges us to mature faster) but it's tiring to be behaving properly all the time (hehe).  It's fun to let loose once in a while and just let go.


It is Friday the 13th! Stay away from black cats! Love you :)

I wanna run, run, run!

Kidding. You know I can't run, run, run, let alone walk, walk, walk, fast.

I don't know what the fuck is happening.  The other night I was giving a pep talk and now I think I need to pep myself up. Apparently, I cannot practice what I preach. Bad, bad, bad.

I don't know if these are just hormones.  It's like there are butterflies in my stomach but I'm not sure if I'm nervous or what basta I'm feeling something weird and it's not happiness. I don't know what it is but I'm pretty sure hindi rin pang romansa (hahaha -- bruha!). Maybe I'm annoyed again at something but I don't know what.

I am fully aware that crankiness is next to ugliness. Let's just have a few drinks and make the cranky go away!

*Sings: 

I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go, somewhere only we know
Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

I saw my past and I saw my future

You take the pieces of the dreams that you have
'Cause you don't like the way they seem to be going
You cut them up and spread them out on the floor
You're full of hope as we begin rearranging
Put it all back together

Rexona

Won't let you down.

Hmmmmmmm. Life.

The Eagle and the Rabbit

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?”

The eagle answered, “Sure , why not.”

So the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.


:-)

It's all about the money! It's all about the dum dum dum dum dum....

In a post-race interview following his last outing for Ferrari, Kimi Raikkonen answered one simple question about his departure and he did confirm what a lot of people have been thinking all along -- it was Santander's money that bought him out of his contract. Santander, Spain's biggest financial institution, has inked a deal for a major Ferrari sponsorship and with it is a clause for a Spanish driver in the Ferrari cockpit. The Spaniards waved a big wad of cash, which, of course, the Italians couldn't resist.

Today I got a DM from Ferrari in my inbox with the subject, "Thank you for everything Kimi".  Of course, it's a tribute to their only World Champion after Schumacher, right? WRONG.

They're promoting Raikkonen merchandise. Hahaha! At the end of the day, yes it's a sport but it's also a huge business.  Good thing they announced Raikkonen's departure before I saw the Ferrari Store in San Francisco.  I would've been gutted (gutted - haha, I love this British expression) if I bought stuff only to find out they're outdated just days after as I'm sure I would've gotten Raikkonen stuff because even if he were the only Ferrari driver left in the world, I'll never spend money on Felipe Massa. The Ferrari Store was cool but I didn't bother to check it out because I already know what's inside and more importantly, I was told that they prohibit picture-taking inside. I don't buy racing stuff because I don't wear those. Mug? Keychain? Lanyard? I imagine my brother and my cousin would have appreciated caps, shirts or jackets -- but they're both McLaren fans. :)

Then again, even if I went inside the store, I think I wouldn't have gotten anything.  Maybe these would've been useful to me...

But I wouldn't sharpen them because they will shorten. I also wouldn't use the eraser, mauupod. Totoy!

Or this Enzo Ferrari key.

But why would anyone spend 200 grand on a key to a car you don't own??!

Or this Ferrari bike for USD 1,000.00

So ang bike ba, kapag Ferrari, super duper ultra mega bilis din? Like it's capable of 315 km/h (196 mph) and has a 0-100 km/h acceleration time of 4.3 seconds? Heheheh


Anyway, this is probably one of my last F1 posts for this year (the super last one, maybe, when we get that final announcement and the missus gets the sign). It's McLaren or nothing. On to 2010!

Go Lewis! Go Home!

There's no denying that Lewis Hamilton is good. He isn't the 2008 World Champion and 2007 runner up for nothing. However, just like Schumacher, I was never a supporter of Hamilton.  I learned to like Fernando Alonso after all his tantrums, I liked Vettel at the onset, and now I admire rookie driver Kobayashi... but not Hamilton.  So, it's a bit unusual that I found myself rooting for him in the Abu Dhabi GP.  I don't know why but I actually genuinely wanted him to win the race. I recognized the effort he made during the second half of the season and the fact that since June (I think), he's the driver who scored the most points despite not being in contention for the championship. In short, I was a Lewis supporter. Just today... and I wanted it in black and white so here goes my Twitter update:

21 laps later, Lewis Hamilton retires due to a break problem.  That's the first mechanical failure in his F1 career.  And then the Twitter update:

Hahahahahaha! Unfortunately, for so many reasons, both Ferraris and the remaining McLaren (KOValainen) failed to score points thus maintaining the standings before the race. McLaren is third in the constructor's championship. At least I did my part to help Ferrari. Harharhar.

So for 2010, GO HAMILTON! *Evil Laugh*
(Wait... I might actually really really mean it without the bad luck if Raikkonen becomes his teammate)

all the signs point to one thing!

Kimi to McLaren. It's not confirmed yet but I really feel it. It is what it is - the second coming.

From a PR standpoint, I understand why they won't confirm it yet. As they are still fighting for third place with Ferrari, Kimi Raikkonen is technically still a competitor and a team like McLaren would serve their fans and sponsors well by assuring them that both their drivers, Hamilton and Kovalainen, have their full backing as they engage in one final battle in Abu Dhabi.  The non-confirmation of Raikkonen at this point is out of respect to outgoing McLaren driver Heikki Kovalainen.

Also from a PR standpoint, I can see that since a few races ago, they've already started laying down the groundwork for Kimi Raikkonen's return without anyone really confirming anything.  Even before it was confirmed that Raikkonen is leaving Ferrari, McLaren boss Martin Whitmarsh has been giving interviews and commenting about Raikkonen's good performance despite having a bad car. It's unusual for competitors to give praises to each other's drivers.  When Raikkonen won for the first time this year in Belgium, McLaren was the only team whose official quotes ALL contained congratulatory messages for Raikkonen.  In Singapore, a few days after Ferrari confirmed Alonso, Whitmarsh was asked if they wanted to take Raikkonen back and he just smiled.  In Japan, a few days later, McLaren's race preview quotes that were released to the media contained a lot of reference to Raikkonen's win in Japan in 2005 and how it brought back memories of the Suzuka circuit.

And now in Abu Dhabi, when asked about his options for 2010, Kimi explicitly said that if he were to stay in F1, McLaren is the only option even if Toyota also made an offer.  The other options aside from F1 are to go rallying or a year-long sabbatical.  He also kind of alluded to an agreement at the FIA press conference when he stated that his F1 contract allows rallying on the side. Well, he's been doing press activities for years and we all know that he isn't the type of guy who would be caught with his foot in his mouth.  In fact, I imagine it's a challenge to actually be his PR counsel because he'll refuse to say anything even if you want him to...  So for him to be able to state that casually could only mean that he knows an agreement has been reached and the deal is in the bag.

Then again, I could be over-reading things. I could be wrong but I hope I'm right!

qwertyuiop

Last Monday, you let us down but I was the one who took the cudgels for all of us.  I was really disappointed but instead of confronting you about it, I said I was gonna sleep it off and I did. I felt better on Tuesday despite the fact that you made no effort to own up to your shortcomings. Today came and you were at it again - disregarding directives and ignoring reminders. And tonight I decided to drink it off. Everything has a limit, you know. I wonder what you have for me tomorrow. BRING IT ON. You're so important... You see? You have your own blog entry.

asdladjfal;jf adsljfadsf

Ayoko na.

PUTANGINA!

status updates

If I compiled my 'would've been' status updates today, it would look like this.  Beginning at 8:55 A.M.:

1. Joy is back in the office. Back on earth. Back in the real world.
2. Joy is about to have a quick lunch before going to a meeting that she actually knows nothing about.
3. Joy talked her way through the meeting she knew nothing about and came out tops. How often she can wing things like this, she isn't sure.
4. Joy is utterly disappointed and frustrated that things aren't turning out the way they're supposed to.
5. Joy lost her cool again this afternoon and regrets that she did... but on second thought, that outburst was actually quite 'contained' already. Clap, clap, clap.
6. Joy thinks she needs a course on people management 101. Mission mentorship = fail.
7. Joy should've just watched U2's Live concert stream on YouTube all afternoon instead of stressing out over something which didn't materialize anyway. Stress is the enemy. Mind over matter.
8. Joy wants Max's fried chicken for dinner - a notch higher than Jollibee's Chickenjoy in the comfort food list, but a few levels lower than beer in the overall comfort shit list. But not drinking tonight. No.
9. Joy needs a pick-upper and is driving through Skyway with Boom Boom Pow and Right Round on loop. Singing along but not necessarily feeling upbeat.
10. Joy 's dad actually made sure they had Max's for dinner to help brighten up her mood. How sweet!
11. Joy finds writing therapeutic and so here she is...
12. Joy is listening to Goo Goo Doll's "Name" and feels like crying for no apparent reason.
13. Joy is amused that the next song on her iPod is Hootie and the Blowfish's "Let Her Cry".  She really feels like crying for no apparent reason.
14. Joy is amused yet again that the song after Hootie's is Oasis' Stop Crying Your Heart Out. WTH?!!!
15. Joy wants to put her heart on a shredder now...  No, wait... Perhaps she wants to put somebody else's head on a shredder? It's empty anyway (referring to somebody else's head).
16. Joy now craves for Fritos Scoops + Fritos Mild Cheddar dip. No crying.
17. Joy dreads the weekend because it means the 2009 F1 Season is ending with the last race in Abu Dhabi and she'd have nothing to follow every other week for the next 3 months. Also Kimi Raikkonen's last race for Ferrari, and possibly his last in F1 (please, no!).
18. Joy feels like dancing everytime she hears Supermassive Blackhole. Wooohooo, booty shake! Yes, switched playlists already.
19. Joy will give away chocolates in the office tomorrow. Trick or treat! :)
20. Joy is shutting down in a while to go drive a few tracks on Ferrari Challenge on Wii. Must master breaking zones in Mugello! That's therapeutic activity #2 today. (11:55 P.M.)

So if I updated my Facebook status like this in a day (as much as some people do), do you think you know me any better than you do now? Yeah, of course not.

I wonder what's with all the "what are you doing" / "what are you thinking" status updates on SNS (social networking sites - picked that up from Singapore) that appeal to people a lot. I'm really just curious because I'm one of those people, too. I abuse Twitter, especially, because I know less people there than I do on Facebook so my tweeps couldn't really give a damn about what I 'share' there. It's a good way to communicate indirectly, and to a certain extent, a form of release but nothing more if you're not famous like Ashton Kutcher. Nobody really cares but we still do it.  Wonder what they'll come up with next (that I'll eventually succumb to)?

Airport Terminal Conversations

DEPARTURE
Episode Title: Katakawan

I recently went to Singapore along with some media for a product launch.  Four of us travelled together on the same flight departing for Singapore.  I arrived in the airport first so I parked myself in Tinderbox and waited for the others.  For the record, all I got for myself was a bottle of mango juice. I anticipated that the rest wanted breakfast before boarding so I hung out in Tinderbox. One by one, they came. Every time, I'd order a panini and orange juice at the counter.

Joy to waiter: I'll get one turkey sandwich and orange juice.
Waiter: Okay, ma'am, serve nalang nung kasama ko.
(I go back to the table, the order is delivered.  Moments later, another one of them arrives and I offer a sandwich. I go to the counter again because it's pay as you order.)
Joy to waiter: Isa pang panini, Tuna naman. And then orange juice din.
Waiter: Okay, ma'am. Dalin nalang namin don.
(I go back to the table and the order is delivered.  Minutes later the last one arrives. Again, I go to the counter to get him a sandwich but this time, he goes with me).
Joy to waiter: Isa pa ulit na panini. Tuna din. And bottled water.
Waiter (feeling close na siya): Aba! Mukhang nasarapan ka na talaga ha! Dalawang panini pa naman per order! Bilis mo!
Joy (bewildered): PUCHA! Akala mo ba ako kumakain lahat non?!
Media: Grabe ka pare, kahit malusog yan di pa siya kumakain ng kahit anong panini sa araw na to!

Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuh!!! What more can I say about this... nothing!


ARRIVAL
Episode Title: Katotoyan

After all was done and we're back in Manila, I stayed a little bit more at the airport's arrival area and had a much needed 'break' with one of them:

W: Uhm, Joy, by the way, may I ask how old you are?
Me: Sure. I'm 26.
W: Oh, okay...
Me: Is that consistent with how old you thought I was?
W: See, that's my problem. I'm having a hard time in that area. You look 24/25 but you act like 34... as if ang ang tagal mo nang ginagawa yang ginagawa mo. As if alam mo talaga yang ginagawa mo!

Well, is five years long enough? He's actually right about that because those five years actually felt like 10! But let me get this straight: he's saying I look young but I act like I know what I'm doing, right? but by adding that last phrase, he's kind of saying that as if  lang but not really? Haha! Funny ha.

In this instance, what does one really need to do to appear credible? Can't I just be like the female version of Peter Pan? As in Petra Pan? and live in Neverneverland and nevernever-have-to-do-anything-but-play? No? Okay. I'll just have to deal with it then. It's just weird now but I know I'll love it when I'm 40 and I'll still look 30! And when I'm 60 they won't accept my senior citizen's card because I look 50!

BUTT! I just have to say that in another airport, I didn't seem dubiously young to be suspected of carrying out an affair. THAT I wasn't prepared for. I actually wrote it already so I won't forget the experience, I just haven't published it yet (or if I'll ever get to finish the whole trip narrative. At least I'm done with the first part!). That one's quite the experience - I came so close to losing it at the immigration counter!

There's no such thing as love. It's a fantasy.

I love it when love stories don't end the way we expect them to. Love, love, love. A girl who doesn't believe in love, a guy who believes the opposite - love, fate, destiny. The guy pursues the girl, the girl responds to the guy... montage scenes of the guy and girl having fun together, then the girl breaks up with the guy out of the blue, the guy is devastated, the girl eventually gets engaged to a new guy, the old guy is even more devastated, the girl looks for old guy and talks to him one last time, old guy gets over it. Old guy meets new girl. Back to day 1.

The best thing about it is that it's a quirky rom-com that doesn't paint a rosy picture of what love is, rather, it gives a realistic take on relationships and why they don't work out the way they should. It's very creatively made with a nice parallelism of one's expectations and actual reality.  I just found it funny, too, that they included a dance sequence that is characteristic of lousy Pinoy movies, but the one here was entertaining to say the least.


Deconstruction 101
-----------------------------------

Tom: You never wanted to be anybody’s girlfriend and now you’re somebody’s wife.
Summer: That surprised me too.
Tom: I don’t think I’ll ever understand that… I mean it doesn’t make sense.
Summer: It just happened.
Tom: Right… but that, that’s what i don’t understand. what just happened?
Summer: I just, I just woke up one day and I knew.
Tom: Knew what?
Summer: What I was never sure of with you.
Tom: You know what sucks? That everything you believe in is complete and utter bullshit. It sucks. You know, destiny, soul mates, true love and all that childhood fairytale, none sense. You were right. I should have listened to you.
Summer: I guess it's coz I was sitting in a deli and reading Dorian Grey and a guy comes up to me and asks me about it. And now he is my husband. So what if I've gone to the movies? What if I had gone somewhere else for lunch? What if I'd gotten there ten minutes later?  It was meant to be and I just kept thinking. Tom was right.

Because we all need alone time.

Button needed "alone time" to celebrate

Despite his description by some as the "playboy world champion", Jenson Button did not celebrate wildly after securing the 2009 title in Brazil on Sunday.

The Briton had been scheduled to return to Europe on Sunday evening for a PR commitment, but his Brawn teammate Rubens Barrichello offered the use of his private jet so that he could stay another night in Sao Paulo.

But it emerges that 29-year-old Button stayed less than an hour at the team's party before returning to his hotel.

"I wanted a bit of alone time," he told British reporters, drinking a glass of white wine and wearing a t-shirt that read 'What goes around, comes around'.

"We all celebrate it in different ways, and for me to just chill on my own was the best thing for me. I was on the phone to my girlfriend, my family as well, my mum, so I was up until about 4am just lying in bed with a big grin on my face," said Button. 

Playing it by ear is the best itinerary you can have for a vacation

As much as I like being surrounded with people, I also like being alone. I insisted on getting my 'alone time' on my first day in NYC and that's what I remember most: walking alone in a totally new place with no absolute destination, without anyone to take me around, getting lost in spite of having a map and figuring my way out of the busy place. Was I excited? You bet! I just didn't look like it (heck, I was alone. That would've been funny)... but deep inside I'm like "Wooooooow, it's so beautiful, I wanna lie on the pavement!" kinda giddy. haha. TOURIST!  It must've been obvious that I was lost - three random strangers offered help with directions that day... Or maybe I was walking around, looking at the buildings with a smile on my face. yuuuuuuck!!! haha

Yon naman eh, smiling while alone eh di naman ako nanalo ng world championship!

mindbite for the day

Brazilian Drama

Interlagos never fails to produce one of the most dramatic races every year.  In 2007, Kimi Raikkonen won the world title in an amazing comeback which saw him triumph from a 16-point deficit to upset title favorites Fernando Alonso and Lewis Hamilton.  He nipped the title with just a 1-pt advantage over the other two.  In 2008, on the last lap, Lewis Hamilton was in 6th place and looked as if he's losing the title to Felipe Massa as Hamilton needed to secure at least 5th.  Eventually, Felipe Massa won the race and was deemed champion for 30 seconds until Glock (in 5th place) lost grip and slowed down dramatically.  Hamilton overtook and crossed the line in 5th. And today... Button delivered.

Winning in style

Jenson Button, 2009 F1 World Champion! A lot of people doubted Button's capability, myself included.  I wasn't rooting for him -- I felt that he just wasn't up there yet with Alonso, Hamilton and Kimi and it just so happened he had a superior car.  Mid-season, it just looked like he'd blow it. But the point is, he delivered - and fiercely, he drove to the title.  It wasn't a case of everything falling into place. He worked really hard, particularly in this race where he had to make his way up from 14th place to 8th, enough to clinch the title. He did a lot of overtaking moves which have been pretty scarce in F1 lately - and this silenced doubters (oo na, myself included!).  After 9 years and some 190 races, he ain't just a pretty boy in the paddock anymore. He now has WDC to his name. Brawn is a success story in itself, and Button's is a very deserved win. Kudos!

From zero to hero.


No fire can make the Iceman melt




Star Sports Commentator (during race highlights): Kimi Raikkonen, the Iceman... Remained as cool as ice even when his face was on fire! He just didn't care and went on!

After the incident, Raikkonen reported that he got petrol in his eyes and they were burning but he saw the fire went out and he kept going in the hopes of scoring more points for the Scuderia. Ferrari, after all, needed to keep third place in the constructor's championship otherwise they'll lose £10 million to McLaren. He started in 5th, charged to 3rd after Turn 1 and got involved in separate incidents with Red Bull and Force India which required him to return to the pits to change tyres and get a new front wing at the end of Lap 1.  He came back in P14, fought on to recover and finished 6th. Talk about determination and dedication even when it's already known that he's leaving Ferrari next season.  He is part of the team until officially out.

My eyes are still burning, but I'm alright.

I love this.

From Coco. :) I actually said something like this before...

3 years ago, Gweilos:

Me (after taking a long swig of beer, poker faced): 

"I don't need to put up with this crap to earn a living."

(PAUSE)

(HAHA! Ang drama!)

I was complaining about a certain person who used to make life more difficult for us than it already was, when in an ideal situation, cooperation should be a given in the backyard.

Things have changed, since. For the better.

AND the post ends here.

I thank you. Bow.

Is this addiction already? No? Good!

I was tweeting earlier about how I needed (or wanted... whatever) a drink but I also needed to finish some work. When all the people left the office, it became eerily quiet and lonely so I decided to relocate but didn't want to go home yet as I'm already in the zone.  To make the long story short, I had a choice between working in Starbucks or somewhere else. Or simply, it was coffee or beer.

Guess what? I didn't go to Starbucks. Haha. It's the first time I tried this -- went to a Greenbelt restaurant, requested for a table outdoor near a power outlet, ordered beer and food, and worked there.  I guess because I was so busy and into what I was doing, it didn't matter that I was alone.

Five beers later, I was done. Productive!

"Good teams can lose, but they recover and bounce back."

Perhaps, in our day-to-day battles, we can pick up a thing or two in the success story that is the Ateneo Blue Eagles 2009 basketball campaign.  Reposting a part of Fr. Niebres' homily at the mass before the bonfire - a great read.

Now that we have won the championship, we can look back to the embarrassing and painful loss to UE in Game 2 and see that it was a grace in that it taught our team and, I hope all of us, many lessons.

I hope Coach Norman won’t mind my telling what I recall of the story of lessons learned. He can correct my memory where it is inaccurate.

In the dugout Sunday after the loss, Coach Norman began by confronting the players

With what they did not do. “We are a defense team. Did we play defense?” “Our offense is premised on an inside game, inside first, from inside to outside. Did we do that?”

With what they did – “Look, you took this outside shot, look at the shot clock, still 15 seconds. No need to do that. I do not mean that you should not take the shot if you are free. But that is not our first option.”

He said, we all made mistakes, your coaches acknowledge their mistakes. You have to acknowledge your mistakes too. Not to blame others, but to face yourself.

Lesson 1, my favorite leadership guru, Heifetz, says that moving forward begins with: “Acknowledge your share of the mess .”.

Then Coach Norman shifted. He asked: “How many games did we win? 15. It is not easy to win 15 games.” Meaning, this defeat is not abnormal, it happens to good teams. Good teams can lose, but they recover and bounce back.

Then: Look around you, this circle is what counts and what should count for you. When you leave this room, you will hear a lot of negative comments. Ignore them, listen only to your circle here.

Finally: Tomorrow we prepare for Thursday’s game.

Lesson 2: Reframe the problem. A good leader moves on to reframe the problem – moving towards positive steps to a solution.

When I joined them Monday late afternoon, I was much impressed that Coach Norman had been spending a lot of time talking one on one with the players.

Then in the group session, he started: “How many games do we still have to play? One. Just one. If we win, we will silence all negative comments. If we lose, you can throw out your 15 game wins, you can throw out your winning statistics against UE. Only one thing counts, Thursday’s game.”

Lesson 3: Focus on the one key thing to be done – WIN GAME 3.

Then with the coaches he went through the tapes and play by play showed what went wrong and what had to be done. They translated the overall exhortation and focus into detailed deliverables. “See – UE ran this pick and role play 17 times, you tried to steal the ball and fell behind your man and he swept by you for the layup. Stay in front of your man. Stay in front of your man.

Lesson 4: Translate the exhortations and motivation into behavior, into detailed deliverables.

From then on, practice was on execution, execution, execution.

Last Thursday you saw the results – suffocating defense, dominant inside game, decisive victory. It was not an accident, not suwerte. Hindi sa sinuwerte ang UE noong linggo at sinuwerte tayo noong huwebes. It was the fruit of hard work, coming from lessons learned, leadership and unity coming from a defeat.

Underlying it all is a deep trust between coach and players and among the players themselves. “Listen to your coach. We your coaches work very hard to study the games and to design how you can win.”

Full text here.

aaaaaaaaaaw.

(Click on image to enlarge)

Every now and then, children need to be assured that they're making their parents proud.  That, perhaps, is one of the best votes of confidence one can ever have. Just like when we were younger - it really makes us feel better when our moms would kiss our wounds to make the pain go away.

Same shit, different day.

Why am I always at fault? Not fair.

Aaaaaargh. I just wanna be on the beach.

Today (well, I mean yesterday. It's about 2 am) is such a crappy crappy day and I just have to write about it.  

It's a combination of so many different little things that complicated my day and it's not even about work, really. Work is just about 10% of it and it's actually not the work itself, only part of it, and there comes a point when you don't care anymore and just forget about whatever it is that stressed you out. If you get what I mean.

About the other things, - I'm not going to air my dirty laundry here.  All I wanna say is that things would've been clearer and less complicated if my brother were still here to listen to me rant and then make me see things in a better light.  Rather than what I'm doing now, if he were here, we're probably out in our little garden having a long conversation about my issues over microwaved popcorn and Coke. Haaaay.  You never really get to appreciate these little moments until you realize that you can never ever experience them again.

Although... I have to stress that I don't really run out of people to talk to, but there are times when I just miss talking to my brother. The conversation is just not the same with anyone else. I miss, miss, miss.

I'm a proud Atenean.

woooooooooooohooooooo! (pero pabulong lang!) -- inside joke :)


Too bad I didn't get to see the game live. I was in HK. Then again had I not been in HK, I would've also only seen this on TV as it happened on a Thursday... followed by a pizza party at the office just like winning the championship last year! It's actually nice to have an Atenean as a boss because wala mashadong bashers pag nanonood kami ng game in the conference room and it seems okay with him kahit lantarang wala kang ginagawang productive for 2 hours. May libreng pizza pag panalo, tahimik lang lahat pag talo. Hahaha. Although baduy minsan dahil walang kumokontra!

Things to do in Hong Kong

1. BUY TAIKOO BROWN SUGAR CUBES FOR MY BOSS   2. BUY PLASTIC BOOTS FOR MY COLLEAGUE  3. AND OH YES... ATTEND AND PRESENT AT A REGIONAL PR MEETING. ...BLOGGING FROM THE AIRPORT AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHY SMALL CAPS DOESN'T WORK ON BLOGGER NOW & EVEN THE ENTER KEY! IT'S JUST NOT POSSIBLE TO MAKE PARAGRAPHS HERE! HOW ANNOYING!

Let's not blow it like we did 2 years ago!

Ohhhhkay... someone's probably still hungover from the trip. What the hell am I doing up at 3am with nothing to do? I can still even hear the song in my head... California, Californiaaaaaah

This afternoon was a typical cloudy day in the Philippines (the one when it's like it's going to rain but not quite), but I was sweating loads! I would've probably sweat a lot more than the basketball players in Araneta had we not found a spot directly under an aircon in the coliseum. Guess you probably appreciate the good weather elsewhere when you're reminded of how it's so much better than hot and humid.

Add the fact that Ateneo actually LOST the game by a margin of probably more than 15 points. Not good. So not good! AM I REALLY HOME? I must be dreaming! How could we lose like that? We could've been champions today but we're not and we now find ourselves in a position where we could easily lose the championship to a team who wants it more than we do.  UE has not won a championship for something like 24 years and that will definitely work up their psyche. It's ours to lose. The Blue Eagles better not choke because it sure is gonna be embarrassing to do so effing well the whole season except in the games that matter. It's like crashing in the final lap after leading the race since the start. Oh, c'mon!

It's do or die in Thursday and I won't be here to see it.  Well, goodluck, boys. I'll be elsewhere in Asia Pacific holding out on my own while you battle for pride and glory.  I just hope to get some good news on Thursday.

Meanwhile...

We've been on the run, driving in the sun, looking out for number one... Ayan na naman! I'll try to sleep again.  The whole trip deserves it's own blog entry anyway, one that's not written through the tiny QWERTY keypads of this mobile phone.

I'm back at work in a few hours, fully recharged. Bring it on, bitches! Harhar! :)

It's imminent...

Kimi will return to McLaren!

Hello from San Francisco! :)

Twice to beat and twice beaten: It's Ateneo and UE in the finals!

All along I thought it was FEU. Not sure what happened but right when they're about to play their final four match against UE, the FEU management dropped their star player from the team with people saying its because of game fixing. His performance steadily declined over the past few games and he was asked to explain this to the management. Well, obviously, this has impacted the morale of the FEU team negatively. They were leading the standings with Ateneo and they just lost it.

It's sad to hear stories like this. Just earlier this week, Renault's ever flamboyant Flavio Briatore was handed a lifetime ban from Formula 1 for allegedly ordering his support driver to deliberately crash in Singapore to help Fernando Alonso win. Yup, Spanish wonder boy in another controversy.

What's the point of playing a sport if they're only going to 'fix' it? Why don't they just make a movie if they already knew how it'd end, anyway?  Oh, right. You can't bet in movies.

Walking around just like they do on Gossip Girl

I have weird sleeping habits here on the other side of the world. My cousins were expecting me to go through some jet lag after my first longest flight ever but that wasn't the case. Perhaps the beer helped (upon arrival and after dinner) put me to sleep... for 11 hours! and then everything's back to normal.

Went around midtown Manhattan alone. Fun experience! My cousin didn't want to let me go at first because she was worried I'd get lost or whatever but I insisted on going and I was fine.  She printed something from Google Maps for me and it was pretty accurate. I went the wrong way a couple of times but the street names were numbers so it was easier to navigate. I now understand the directions they give on Gossip Girl, haha!

It's 7:25 am now. Woke up so early!

FORESIGHT

n.

1. Perception of the significance and nature of events before they have occurred.
2. The exercise of good judgment or common sense in practical matters

That's probably it -- what we have (most of the time) that other people don't have; what should've allowed us to control things that we now think were beyond our control anyway (or is it a mere excuse?).

So how do you acquire Foresight? Is it acquired or innate? 


Well, let me know if it's for sale anywhere... I'll buy mega loads and give them as Christmas giveaways - for you and for me and the entire human race.

Mind Bites.

I was going through mind bites on flickr and quite coincidentally, they seem to have one similar theme.  Just the ones that caught my eye today... or perhaps, it's no coincidence at all.

This one was sent by a friend to a group - for La Sallians, when the Green Archers didn't make it to the final four this year... or should I say "when the Green Archers failed to make it to the final four." Haha, kidding.  We Ateneans waited 14 years to win a championship, allow us naman to have fun making fun of you! But it's all good. All good! :)